You Can Have It All...

Actually you can't. Sorry. But don't shoot the messenger I didn't make the rules. That's what society says though right? That's the message on every billboard it seems. You can have it all, you need it all, you'll only be happy if you can get everything you want. Yet I am discovering quite a different reality. A simple truth that is hidden. Ignored. Covered up?

We are containers. Only so much will fit. There is an end to ourselves. Holy COW! I am not enough in some circumstances. That one really freaked me out. Lol. I am not enough to heal someone, I am not enough to make others happy, I am not enough to keep a company in business, and on and on it goes. 

So what is the root of the problem here? What is this undefined law or reality or what have you that I keep bumping into? I was trying to think of a good word for it, and well... I've decided to call it the "I am not God factor." Now I would never have admitted this in my early 20s but now I can say with all the humble contrition it should be stated with, that I thought I was God. Not that I was fully delusional, but just partially. I thought that I had an attribute of His. I thought I was UNLIMITED.

In the years since, I have encountered many bitter-sweet moments. And bitter sweet moments prove something to me. They prove that sometimes you can't have both. No doubt we WANT both. But someone in His almighty wisdom decided it would not work best for us, and thus allows us to experience our limits. And let's be honest... that really ticks us off. Right? 

Here are some examples, I want to keep all my friendships, because they all have something to offer. But guess what? I am limited. I cannot have tons of deeps friendships. Why? Because deep inherently means it costs me more. And I only have so much. So if I want deep, I cannot have a hundred friends. Acquaintances maybe, but not true friends.

How about for all of you who are mothers. I've been watching several of my friends who have little ones, that are leaving the "baby" stage. There are so many bitter sweet moments No? You cannot have both a baby and a man. You have to let go of one to have the other. I suppose you could TRY breast feeding him at 15, but I don't recommend it. ;-)

How about mother-in-laws. You cannot control your son and have a good relationship with his wife. Am I right? You have to let go of your son, if you want a healthy relationship with your daughter-in-law.

These are harsh realities at times. Letting go is difficult. We don't want to be required to let go. Why can't we just have both? Well there is great news. GREAT news. I'm telling you this is so exciting. When we embrace our limits, we inherently increase our quality. The true lesson here, is a lesson in value. YOUR value. 

You and I are in fact LIMITED. It's included in the human being package. It can be tempting to see this as a problem if you hold the belief that you are supposed to meet people's needs, or make them happy, etc. (Which I did. I'll admit it. I totally thought that.) Come to find out... other people are responsible for their happiness, for their inner level of peace. For their health. For themselves. And there is a God who is UNLIMITED who is ready and waiting for them to ask for His help.

In this season of my life, I have had the joyous opportunity to look my limits square in the face. It has been such a pleasant and peaceful experience. NOT! I hate it. I hate it. I hate it... 

And I hate it some more. 

Yet slowly I have begun to see my limits in a new light. Take ocean front property for example. Do you ever wonder why it's so much more expensive to live on the beach? No you don't really do you? You already know. Because there is a limit to the amount of "beach front" in the world. Limited things actually hold a high value. So let me ask you a few questions if I may?

What do you think is a fair price for your property? For what you possess? For your health? For what you offer in friendship? Are you asking it? I didn't say demanding it. That is totally all wrong. But are you requiring it. Because you will be paid the price that you require. Not by all, but by the some. (The ones who see your worth.) And do you really want to be drained by a bunch of people that don't know your worth anyway?

For those looking to purchase or invest relationally? 

Remember... you get what you pay for. ;-)And specifically to those people who are always looking for a deal. Nothing wrong with that. Nothing wrong with it at all. But that doesn't work when it comes to people. Don't believe me? Take a look at the majority of your friendships and honestly answer this question to yourself. Are you the taker or the giver? I'll wager to bet you're the giver. Tired of that? There's one solution. Be willing to purchase higher quality.